Spit Wads and Paper Boats

Five years and four months ago Amy and I sat in the bathroom of a small apartment. We talked about ourselves and about people we knew. We shot spit wads at little paper boats that we had set sail in the bathtub. It was not an ordinary night. It was our first date. We made a horrible mess in the bathroom that night. The shower walls were covered with spit wads. The paper boats eventually became water logged and sank into wet blobs. I promised to come back the following day and help clean up the mess.
The next morning I showed up with breakfast and we spent the entire day together. From that day until we were married just over four months later, we never went a day without seeing each other. I remember that I felt more comfortable around her than anyone else I knew. She had a great sense of humor and we always had fun together.
After a bit of convincing I finally talked her into marrying me and on July 25th of 2003 we were married. We have now been married for five years. In five years you learn a few things about marriage. Here are some of my tips for a successful marriage.
1. When she says that it's ok with "that tone, " it's not ok.
2. Her job is harder than yours. Period.
3. Your $500 stereo system is to be heard only at low volume and never seen.
4. Your music is just noise unless her friends like it.
5. Liquid dishwasher detergent is not the same as powdered dishwasher detergent.
6. Twenty dollars spent on a DVD is a waste, twenty dollars spent on decorations is a bargain.
7. Womens brains are not smaller than mens brains.
8. If you are going to shave your head don't do it right before a big family event.
9. The correct spelling of compromise is "letsdowhatyouwanttodo."
10. She feels the same way about cars as you do the color mauve.
11. All you need is love (The Beatles) and love doesn't require much. Sometimes just spit wads and paper boats.